Monday, June 8, 2009

...and she's off...

fur·lough (fûr'lō)

–noun
1.Military. a vacation or leave of absence granted to an enlisted person.
2.a usually temporary layoff from work: Many plant workers have been forced to go on furlough.
3.a temporary leave of absence authorized for a prisoner from a penitentiary.

–verb (used with object)
4.to grant a furlough to.
5.to lay (an employee or worker) off from work, usually temporarily.

Today was my first official day off on a week long furlough. I have promised myself to NOT be so emotionally raked over the proverbial coals this time. The economy takes a toll on my psyche quite often and furlough days can just send me into a complete spiral. So, to counteract the possibilities, I am trying to keep busy. Tomorrow, I go back to my new natureopath and then maybe I'll walk around downtown a bit ? I also plan to grab my camera and head off to the The Oregon Garden on Wednesday or Thursday for some exploring and fun. Egads, and I have a stack of books begging to be read ! I have to consciously attempt to not allow myself to get too up in my head. I need to remember to breath, relax and enjoy the time off.

Breath.

Hubby and I are going to do a Harry Potter marathon too ! Snacks, drinks and the whole set of HP dvds back to back ! We're geeks !

I've been SO up in my head and I continue to mean to get on here to work through it. That, as silly as it sounds, just feels HUGE. I mean, putting the demons in my head onto paper - to run and jump about - in the broad daylight for ALL to see ?!. Uff....that's big. I haven't gotten that brave yet. I do keep taunting and threatening my head with calling someone to help, but haven't gotten *that* brave yet either.

Somethings gotta give.

I'll be back here in the next few days to report my progress...I promise.

ZOMG, before I go though - srsly ! I downloaded and have attempted to reacquaint myself with Anarchy Online because well.....I have time. What a piece of crap game >.< I should be a kinder, gentler kind of player - but wow. Bad graphics, confusing game play, dumb UI.

That, my friend, is NO way to spend a week off unpaid.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Turning the page

That title bothers me because it doesn't necessarily say what I want it to. My original thought process was, "Do you ever get to a point in your life when you know you can't keep doing what you're doing and that changes need to be made ?"

I'm there.

"Turning the page" is so dramatic and forlorn and that's just not the tone I'm trying to fill you with. Just more of a "I'm tired and I'm not going to take it anymore". Oh, that's good. I *am* tired. I *don't* want to take it anymore.

So the weekend began as gloriously as most weekends do. Options galore and an amazing amount of free time to do with as I please. I embroidered quite a bit because I wanted to finish my Mother's Day gift (pics of that later once I'm reunited with my camera). I'm quite pleased with the way it turned out, but I do really need to take out her lips and redo. Why did I think pale pink was the way to go ? Pfft. Her glory is quieted by her pale lips. Anyway, Saturday was leisurely sublime. I embroidered, watched Repo! The Genetic Opera, watered plants, cleaned the carpets and just enjoyed the day.

Today *cry* I have been plagued with heartburn. Not the normal "meh, I am uncomfortable" type of heartburn but the "omg, I wonder what's wrong with me" type of heartburn. I have been reading too much, imagining the horrific tests *they* are going to want to do and have visions of Clockwork Orange floating in my brain.

*pout*

Friday night and Saturday night = no good sleep. I woke up a lot and just didn't get a restful night's sleep. Today I am feeling cheated of my weekend.

Weekends such as this make me wonder if I'm in the right frame of mind. I've needed help before and sometimes I wonder if I'd be better off with more help ? I find myself so engaged in the internal drama and the infinite sadness that I wonder if this is too much for a girl like me to handle. Another reoccurring dilemma that flitters about in my brain once in awhile yet commonly left often unspoken is the number of nervous breakdowns that have happened in my family.

I have to wonder - how far is too far ?

...and compounded with my stomach issues (which like a Woody Allen movie, I am sure it's an ulcer) I have to contemplate that it's time I take care of ME.

NOW.

*moment of silence*

Back to Clockwork....the horrific things they shall do.

*sigh*

I'm better than this.

fin.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Springy Springtime! - Sublime Stitching Tote



It was time to jump back into embroidery. I've always admired Sublime Stitching's work and since friending her on FB, I've gotten the itch to start something. Then, she posted the above bag - and I HAD to have it. Like now. Since then, I've dusted off my beloved books, brought out the box o' floss and sharpened my needles. THEN, coincidentally and like a sign from the floss fairy, the power went out so I happily found myself lounging in bed stitching away with no other possible distraction.

Don't be surprised if you find yourself visually assaulted with the occasional stitching project here. I mean, everything in moderation, right ?

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Oh my...

Strawberry Empanadas
adapted from the InterCourses Cookbook*

1/4 cup reduced fat cream cheese
2 tablespoons brown sugar (I like dark)
2/3 cup coarsely chopped fresh strawberries
1 6-count package refrigerated crescent rolls

Topping (optional)
1 pat of butter
1 tablespoon cinnamon/sugar mix

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
2. Blend the cream cheese and brown sugar in a small bowl. Gently fold in chopped strawberries.
3. Unroll the crescent dough, separating the six triangular pieces. Plop about a tablespoon of the cream cheese filling into the middle of the widest part of the triangle. Fold up the bottom, crimping the side, then wrap the remaining dough around the bundle. Make sure there's no holes where the filling can leak out.
4. Bake for 16-19 minutes, until golden brown and puffy.
5. If you want to use topping, brush the pat of butter gently over the top of oven-warm pastry, then sprinkle with a little of the cinnamon/sugar mix.

Makes 6 Strawberry Empanadas

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This delectable idea brought to you via hand/eye/mind/mouth. Visit for pics <3

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

A horse with no name...

At work we listen to a "work friendly" radio station -- Charlie 97.1 - "we play everything" - that's their tag line. And yes, they do. From Prince, to America, to Ratt, to god knows what. Anyway, they play "A Horse With No Name" by America once in awhile. Every time I hear it, it sits with me for a while after and kind of wraps itself around my frontal lobe and cuddles. So, today it comes on and I realize that it's making its way into my head again and I need to know what the hell it is ! I google the lyrics I can grab and find out it's America.

Who knew.

This is the first song I knowingly realize is by America.

Who knew.

Anyway, it's rad. Someone needs to redo this song....someone ? Hmmm....I'll have to ponder that idea.

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Last time we spoke, I was ranting about food, eating habits (or lack thereof) and self inflicted restraints. I don't know if I want to talk about that right now. It's a big topic and one that I have so many thoughts on. It's annoying. Big. Annoying. Somewhat on the topic, we got 6 boxes - we're talking roughly 72 DOZEN - cookies from one of my clients. They are closing one of their production facilities in our area and apparently have a ton of product to either dump, give away or donate. Insane and bordering on gross.

Well, that was a tangent. Stay with me here.

I've discussed dreams before - pondered them in print. It's odd how they can hang with you so intensely. I dreamed of being in my old room last night. My door wouldn't stay closed for some reason. I kept trying to shove folded pieces of paper in to keep it closed. My mom kept knocking, coming in, giving me folded clothes to put away, etc. I was alone in my room with a boy. I was never allowed to be alone in my room with a boy. *squee* But the door would not cooperate. The funny thing is, in this dream, I was whisked back to being 16, giddy and goofy. Trying to be grownup but annoyed far too much to keep my composure.

Weird.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Eat Me.

This thread was going to be titled, "Eat Me" ala Alice in Wonderland, but I figured that might be too in your face. So as I start writing, it goes unnamed. I was just in the kitchen preparing meatloaf for dinner and got to thinking about eating, the (in)ability to eat and/or restrictions that we put on ourselves all in the name of eating. I don't mean restrictions to maintain a healthy lifestyle, I mean....other restrictions.

Wait, wait....wait. Let me get my thought process started at the beginning and we'll finish at the end - shall we ?

So the last time I was visiting my parents, I noticed that my Dad had his crusts cut off his sandwich. Seemingly surprised, I asked why. Because it gets too tough to chew with his dentures. Makes sense. I actually felt a little sheepish for asking, but moved past it. Today, as we talked on the phone, Mom mentioned a recipe for Lavender Biscotti and Dad quickly added, "oh, I love biscotti".

Huh.

"But it's so hard" ?

Silence. On to next topic.

As I mixed up the meatloaf, I was deep in thought of how eating is tied up in so many things for us as humans. We get nourished by food, not only physically, but emotionally. We eat a certain type of food and we're instantly whisked back to a time in our past that holds dear to our heart.....or not. Depending on how our family ate definitely is embedded in how we eat now, as adults. I've always been proud of the fact that as a child, dinner was a very important time in our house. 5:00pm came and if I wasn't home with a good reason, there was going to be hell to pay. We sat down as a family, recounted our days, and shared a home cooked meal. From scratch - fresh, international, interesting meals. We laughed, we cried, we yelled or we just ate and enjoyed the company. Either way, eating dinner together has been ingrained in me as something that is important.

The food we ate didn't follow a low-carb/low-fat/gluten-free/vegan/vegetarian or otherwise restricted regime. It was whole food. Unprocessed and uncompromised.

Here is where things get confusing.

As a species, how can we have so many different ways of eating ? Forgive me, I'm not a specialist in dietary needs or restrictions - but when you stop to think about it, it's really interesting how we all have such different ideas/needs on what to eat. I am lead to wonder if all the processed-quickie types of foods have hurt us to the point of desperately grasping at a new allergy ?

Personally, I had felt like I found a health mecca when I was first introduced to low-carb. After battling internally the LC concept for literally years, I gave in and saw my body transform. It was amazing, shocking, it grasped at my psyche like a drug. I dreamed of hot, crusty bread and fought the urge to eat any sugar at all. As with any drug, once it's out of your system, the cravings subside. I was at one with my desires and was ready to take on the world. The thing is, avoiding carbs and sugar is really tough and I really started questioning my need for them. Not my desire to have them in all that I eat, but in moderation. My dietary need for the variety.

Dad has always said, "Everything in moderation" and I have to agree with that idea. Carbs can't be the enemy. Carbs in extreme are the enemy. Huge amounts of sugar in all that we eat is the enemy.

Where am I going with this ?

Oi. I think this post is going to need a "Part 2".

Seriously, it's time for mashed potatoes, meatloaf and brussels spouts !

And for the record, it's being titled EAT ME.

Friday, April 17, 2009

In Love, Part II

It's the weekend. I know, in reality, that every weekend is glorious in its own special way. Each Friday brings about a new excitement, hopes, dreams, books to read, seeds to sow, games to play, dragons to slay and drinks to sip.

I digress, *this* weekend is the first weekend of warm, sunny weather here in Portland. And while I'm not a fan of bright, basking types of days, I'm looking forward to this weekend. I have little sprouted seeds to plant outside and a bookstore that is calling my name. I have an awkward stack of books next to the bed and a head full of weird items that really should hit paper soon. I have toes that whimper to be painted, legs that need a shaving, a funny faded mess of red hair that would love yet another dye job and a pocket full of change...?.....no, I don't have a pocket full of change. One other thing I do have is a desk full of perfume bottles that have not been unpacked. They need places too !

Oh, and I have a pizza in the oven (right here right now) and not one, but TWO movies that we've never watched just waiting patiently on the coffee table. While they are not amazing movies, they are the new James Bond and Bedtime Stories.

...and I have a glass of Stoly and Diet Pepsi next to me.

I also have a twitchy right eye o.O left over from the stress or something.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

In Love....

So, I take a gander at my sad, lonely blog and I'm in love all over again. Ooooh, how the words slide together like oiled cucumbers wrapped in cling wrap...the way the fontalicious images explode in my brain. I love it !

It's been a while. A long while. My brain has been working overtime and I'm ready for the ideas to hit screen soon. Funny how other things/items/time-consuming-crap can take over one's time in no time flat.

I have big plans for a better update in the morning....from my laptop, at work, with my hand wrapped around a cup of green tea.

Until then, sweet dreams and may Chef rock your socks.

Friday, December 12, 2008

I'll miss you, Bettie.



1950s pinup model Bettie Page dies in LA at 85
By BOB THOMAS Bob Thomas
Thu Dec 11, 11:56 pm ET

LOS ANGELES – Bettie Page, the 1950s secretary-turned-model whose controversial photographs in skimpy attire or none at all helped set the stage for the 1960s sexual revolution, died Thursday. She was 85.

Page was placed on life support last week after suffering a heart attack in Los Angeles and never regained consciousness, said her agent, Mark Roesler. He said he and Page's family agreed to remove life support. Before the heart attack, Page had been hospitalized for three weeks with pneumonia.

"She captured the imagination of a generation of men and women with her free spirit and unabashed sensuality," Roesler said. "She is the embodiment of beauty."

Page, who was also known as Betty, attracted national attention with magazine photographs of her sensuous figure in bikinis and see-through lingerie that were quickly tacked up on walls in military barracks, garages and elsewhere, where they remained for years.

Her photos included a centerfold in the January 1955 issue of then-fledgling Playboy magazine, as well as controversial sadomasochistic poses.

"I think that she was a remarkable lady, an iconic figure in pop culture who influenced sexuality, taste in fashion, someone who had a tremendous impact on our society," Playboy founder Hugh Hefner told The Associated Press on Thursday. "She was a very dear person."

Page mysteriously disappeared from the public eye for decades, during which time she battled mental illness and became a born-again Christian.

After resurfacing in the 1990s, she occasionally granted interviews but refused to allow her picture to be taken.

"I don't want to be photographed in my old age," she told an interviewer in 1998. "I feel the same way with old movie stars. ... It makes me sad. We want to remember them when they were young."

The 21st century indeed had people remembering her just as she was. She became the subject of songs, biographies, Web sites, comic books, movies and documentaries. A new generation of fans bought thousands of copies of her photos, and some feminists hailed her as a pioneer of women's liberation.

Gretchen Mol portrayed her in 2005's "The Notorious Bettie Page" and Paige Richards had the role in 2004's "Bettie Page: Dark Angel." Page herself took part in the 1998 documentary "Betty Page: Pinup Queen."

Hefner said he last saw Page when he held a screening of "The Notorious Bettie Page" at the Playboy Mansion. He said she objected to the fact that the film referred to her as "notorious," but "we explained to her that it referred to the troubled times she had and was a good way to sell a movie."

Page's career began one day in October 1950 when she took a respite from her job as a secretary in a New York office for a walk along the beach at Coney Island. An amateur photographer named Jerry Tibbs admired the 27-year-old's firm, curvy body and asked her to pose.

Looking back on the career that followed, she told Playboy in 1998: "I never thought it was shameful. I felt normal. It's just that it was much better than pounding a typewriter eight hours a day, which gets monotonous."

Nudity didn't bother her, she said, explaining: "God approves of nudity. Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, they were naked as jaybirds."

In 1951, Page fell under the influence of a photographer and his sister who specialized in S&M. They cut her hair into the dark bangs that became her signature and posed her in spiked heels and little else. She was photographed with a whip in her hand, and in one session she was spread-eagled between two trees, her feet dangling.

"I thought my arms and legs would come out of their sockets," she said later.

Moralists denounced the photos as perversion, and Sen. Estes Kefauver of Tennessee, Page's home state, launched a congressional investigation.

Page quickly retreated from public view, later saying she was hounded by federal agents who waved her nude photos in her face. She also said she believed that, at age 34, her days as "the girl with the perfect figure" were nearly over.

She moved to Florida in 1957 and married a much younger man, as an early marriage to her high school sweetheart had ended in divorce.

Her second marriage also failed, as did a third, and she suffered a nervous breakdown.

In 1959, she was lying on a sea wall in Key West when she saw a church with a white neon cross on top. She walked inside and became a born-again Christian.

After attending Bible school, she wanted to serve as a missionary but was turned down because she had been divorced. Instead, she worked full-time for evangelist Billy Graham's ministry.

A move to Southern California in 1979 brought more troubles.

She was arrested after an altercation with her landlady, and doctors who examined her determined she had acute schizophrenia. She spent 20 months in a state mental hospital in San Bernardino.

A fight with another landlord resulted in her arrest, but she was found not guilty because of insanity. She was placed under state supervision for eight years.

"She had a very turbulent life," Todd Mueller, a family friend and autograph seller, told The Associated Press on Thursday. "She had a temper to her."

Mueller said he first met Page after tracking her down in the 1990s and persuaded her to do an autograph signing event.

He said she was a hit and sold about 3,000 autographs, usually for $200 to $300 each.

"Eleanor Roosevelt, we got $40 to $50. ... Bettie Page outsells them all," he told The AP last week.

Born April 22, 1923, in Nashville, Tenn., Page said she grew up in a family so poor "we were lucky to get an orange in our Christmas stockings."

The family included three boys and three girls, and Page said her father molested all of the girls.

After the Pages moved to Houston, her father decided to return to Tennessee and stole a police car for the trip. He was sent to prison, and for a time Betty lived in an orphanage.

In her teens she acted in high school plays, going on to study drama in New York and win a screen test from 20th Century Fox before her modeling career took off.

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Associated Press writers Denise Petski and Raquel Maria Dillon contributed to this report.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Time is fleeting...

...so I felt this was appropriate. I love the Baz Luhrmann version. As I was alone in the office the other day listening to my radio station, this came on and just seemed appropriate. I've been somewhat melancholy lately and the words just fit perfectly...

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Everybody's Free (to wear sunscreen)

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of '97... wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be IT.
The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience.


I will dispense this advice now.


Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.

You are NOT as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long, and in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium.

Be kind to your knees, you'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't, maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't, maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself, either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's. Enjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance. Even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents, you never know when they'll be gone for good.

Be nice to your siblings; they are your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.


But trust me on the sunscreen.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Realllllllly......

I'm still here.


*cursor blinkblinkblinkblinkblinkblinkkkkkkkkkk*



*blinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnk*

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Clatter

The inconvenience is mine, she said.

I paid my toll and shuffled about, waiting for the next taxi. I got bored and I filed my nails and bit my lip until it bled. I spent what seemed like years prolifically watching your neurological blips trying to find the pattern to the crazed emotions and outwardly retained ego, to no avail. Just when I thought I could not go on any longer - not for another nanosecond - the sparkly ethereal would catch my eye and the same mundane process would begin.

Again.

It's like wandering in the dark, so often without a warm thought or a cold, snippy word to lash out with. Eyes like the slits of a snake - racing, tracing, pacing in the murk that was left for me (just me) only to find that the road is not a road and my thoughts are not my thoughts but perhaps an obscure dream of yesterday (scrawled lazily on the wall in an inky black smear) that I can't completely recall no matter how hard I try.

Friday, October 31, 2008

Everyday is Halloween

It's been too long since an update ! So here I am to wish everyone a happy happy Halloween and fill your brains with some tasty tidbits of daydreams.

The leaves in Oregon are beautiful right about now....well, I should say until yesterday. The rains have arrived today and it's going to be a leafy, squishy mess here pretty soon. The colours are those of New England - it's truly amazing and has quickly reaffirmed why this is my favourite time of year. I looove the rain too, so as you can imagine, I'm a giddy mess today.

The economy is really screwing with my recruiting mojo. The desperation level in Oregon is reaching maximum capacity. Companies are laying off, individuals are scrounging for anything they can find. I've had accountants, executive admins trying to convince me that I should consider them for a crappy warehouse position that pays $10/hour. *sigh* It makes things so tough - aside from the obvious, but it seriously makes me anxious to see so much desperation in the air.

Speaking of people looking for work, I had a cool interview with a guy this week that plays with Unfallen Heroes. We started discussing old school punk - Bad Religion, The Germs, Black Flag....and he said I should check them out. He dropped off a CD yesterday and they totally rock ! If you want to check out some local Portland talent, have a listen to them. (They have a few songs on their MySpace page). Thanks for the CD, Chris !

WoW and my little night elf druid has been keeping me entertained as I make the crawl to 70. I'm currently 59 and way too into it. Who knew I'd find a druid so exciting ? I suppose it's because they are so versatile and I'm really loving leatherworking and not to mention, the pure adrenaline of waiting for the Lich King ! So many new, cool things happening in game. It's hard NOT to be a totally geeky gamer grrl with the current electronic climate.

Speaking of being a geek, I got Fallout 3 yesterday :D I haven't played it yet (see above) but it came in the cutest little metal lunchbox and a bobble head Pip ! I have the "Making Of" with me today, so I'll check that out later to get my interest peaked a bit more.

Happy Halloween !

Monday, October 13, 2008

Stuffed Bell Peppers !

So, in times of need (aka diet) comes ingenuity. This recipe originally was labeled "Orzo Stuffed Bell Peppers" but I've modified it and made it better (IMO).


The participants in this play:

Prestuffing:

Blessed by Buddha prior to the oven:

...And upon leaving the oven:

The recipe:

Stuffed Bell Peppers

1 (28-ounce) can Italian tomatoes or diced tomatoes
2 zucchini, grated
1 lb. Italian sausage
red pepper flakes, to taste
1/8 cup chopped fresh mint leaves
1/2 cup grated Pecorino Romano, plus more for sprinkling
dash of Tom's Hot Sauce
1/4 cup extra-virgin olive oil
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1-2 cups chicken broth
6 sweet bell peppers (red, orange or yellow)

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F.

Pour the tomatoes into a large bowl and break apart using a pair of kitchen shears or your finger tips. Add the zucchini, mint, cheese, olive oil, garlic, Tom's, salt, and pepper. Stir to combine.

Meanwhile, brown the sausage with a sprinkling of red pepper flakes until done. Stir the sausage into the vegetable mix to combine.

Slice the tops off the peppers and remove all ribs and seeds. Cut a very thin slice from the base to help the peppers stand up.

Place the peppers in the baking dish surrounded with the chicken broth. Spoon the mixture into the peppers. Cover the dish with foil and bake for 45 minutes. Remove the foil, sprinkle the top of each pepper with cheese and continue baking until the cheese is golden, about 15 minutes. Remove from the oven, carefully transfer the stuffed pepper to a serving plate.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Cranky and a headache !

Uff....stand back.

I started South Beach on Monday and I must have forgotten how CRANKY one can become after a few days with no carbs. I have a headache and I am peeing every 5 minutes but dammit, I'm down 4 pounds and it's day 4 !

Other than that, it's been a blurry week. The rain has officially returned to Portland and it's cooled down quite nicely. That means better sleep and better moods . I guess I'm the only freak alive who is absolutely in love with the rain. I definitely get giddy when it's gray and rainy.

Gray and rainy with no carbs.....ya, not so much.

There is something so satisfying with having apparent control over what you eat. I'm not *hungry* and it becomes quite obvious that most of the *bad* things I want are because of urges that have nothing to do with hunger. It seems to be something along the lines of texture, warmth, because I think I need a "reward" or because it's what I eat when I'm doing _____ . Like watching TV - the perfect time to snack on something sweet or have a beer. What about watching TV and drinking water ? Once I'm passed it, I'm still as satisfied, I enjoyed whatever it was I was watching just as much and whatever I do after is typically what I would do even if I would have eaten that cookie...or drank that beer. And maybe I feel better because I didn't eat/drink it.

*sigh*

It's all emotional. Really.

Sunday, October 5, 2008

Best Meatloaf Evah

You heard that right, evah.

I didn't really foresee such a post. You know, about meatloaf but I made this last weekend and Roderic asked for it again this weekend. Really, it's that good.

Brown Sugar Meatloaf

INGREDIENTS
* 1/2 cup packed brown sugar
* 1/2 cup ketchup
* Tom's Hot Sauce (to taste)
* 2 pounds lean ground beef
* 3/4 cup milk
* 2 eggs
* 1 1/2 teaspoons kosher salt
* 1 teaspoon ground black pepper
* 1 shallot, chopped
* 1/4 teaspoon ground ginger
* 1 cup finely crushed Ritz crumbs

DIRECTIONS
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Lightly grease a 5x9 inch loaf pan.
2. Press the brown sugar in the bottom of the prepared loaf pan and spread the ketchup over the sugar. I like to add Tom's HS to the ketchup and also to the meat mixture - how much is up to you.
3. In a mixing bowl, mix all remaining ingredients thoroughly and press into the loaf pan over ketchup.
4. Bake in preheated oven for 1 hour or until juices are clear.

One crazy thing I did this time was used cottage cheese to replace the milk (since we had no milk) and I'm hoping this is going to work. I'm all about guerrilla cooking.

I'll report back =)

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

So incredibly tired. I'm a lunatic, seriously. Laughing, giggling, blabbing on and on about nonsense as my friends and coworkers stare on with confused expressions.

It's been a week and I haven't had a *normal* nights sleep. I've had a variety of distractions and interruptions that have barred me from just sleeping. I've made the Mr. crazy in bed (and not in a good way) because I've tossed or turned or snored or talked in my sleep. (or, the quilt is too "heavy", but that's another post).

So we have Mercury in retrograde until October 15th. That can screw everything up but I don't know if *that's* really it. I imagine it's the change from Summer to Fall. I mean, what else can it be other than writing it off as a nondescript "bad week" ?

I love the fall and winter. Like in a crazy, excited way. I can feel it in the very pit of my core...the butterflies start and I can barely hold myself in check. I find myself being torn into a million different memories as I sniff the air and watch the leaves slowly change from green to a myriad variations of red and gold.

This is MY time. I know Spring/Summer is the time that so many seem to love - the sun, the warmth and fun times. But for me, rain is energizing. Snow is amazing. A cold, rainy Saturday is the best weekend I can think of ! So I'm looking forward to slipping back into the comfort of Fall and Winter.

...and I have to acknowledge that it's one big plus of moving to Oregon. It's cooler here and the chances for snow are better than in my beloved Danville.

Let it snow ! (but for all that is holy, let me get a good night's sleep, please)

Sunday, September 28, 2008

The Fallout of Amazon

Like so few things in life, this gives me an absolute giddy-as-a-schoolgirl-feeling....

Fallout 3 has a release date of October 28th and I've preordered my collector's edition copy :) Sadly, it's not in the original turn based, overhead view style, but I still think it's exciting. Even more exciting would have been if they would have released this as a MMORPG. At that point, I would have screeched and passed out with a grin on my face. That's ok though, you can't always get what you want (but you can try sometimes). Along with the game, I'm getting a bobble head Pip Boy, a metal lunch box and a book - woot !

I also added The Host to my Amazon order. I had a brief internal struggle with ordering this, but whatever, I went ahead and did it. I also have Dark Lover (thanks Mels) and Hairstyles of the Damned on the way. And for audio enjoyment, Brazilian Groove. Putumayo World Music has some great CD's. I learned of them from driving around with our real estate agent of all people. We found Brazilian Lounge at Powell's yesterday, but realized that Brazilian Groove was the one I really liked, so I had to remedy that. We also got French Café which is nice too.

It's a lovely, lazy Sunday. I plan to try a new recipe for meatloaf tonight - so I'll report back with pictures and commentary. I also got fingerling potatoes from Trader Joe's that I can't wait to try.

Enjoy !


Friday, September 26, 2008

Running Like Hell

I've officially committed myself to participating in the Run Like Hell 5k Race in Portland on Oct. 19th. The good thing is, this will force me to do some training, buy some new running shoes (which I've been putting off for a few months) and get some resemblance of exercise in my life. Woot ! I don't foresee dressing up, but I might surprise you.

I went back to Taglio Salon last night and saw Terra. She's awesome and does a great job with hair. After an ever-so-slight nudge, I ended up minus 5 inches. It's a bit of a shock to reach back and have no hair ! So now, it's just below my shoulders. I've been itching to do something but I haven't really known what so this is a great remedy. I'll get it dyed this weekend too and then I'll really feel sassy !

Roderic is particularly spry this morning as he gets word that his beloved Uerige Altbier is being imported to the US after nearly 11 years of absence from his life. We'll be on a mission this weekend as we check out a couple of secret Portland locations to see if we can find its existence. Let's hope the US rep is correct !

Fred is the first puppy I had the pleasure of having in my life. My mom and dad brought him home one day when I was 21 years old and I still remember how amazingly cute he was ! Puppies are cute. Dachshund puppies are cute. Fred's an old man now and his age is starting to show. They feel senility is to blame as well as an infection in his gums. I'll have to get a picture or two scanned in to post, because he really is a cutie.

Fred, feel better soon. Cloe sends a hug too =^..^=


Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Rose Mouth

Crazy cosmic forces caused me to happen upon Gianluca Mattia and his amazing new wave version of the pin up girl. Amazing, bizarre and beautiful things abound ! Go look for yourself :)

It seems to have been an intense last week or two. It's been work, play, sleep, work, play, sleep.....in that order, everyday without fail. More work than play, sadly - but sometimes life is like that. I've been inspired on several occasions with ideas and mental scripts of things I've wanted to get up here but for one reason or another, (see second sentence of this paragraph) it hasn't happened. As luck would have it, I can't for the life of me gather those thoughts together right now. I often wish work was different or perhaps I wished that I worked differently - I get there and that's all I do (with the very occasional peak at email) is work. I find myself intense (there's that word again) on the day and focused on the task at hand. I would rather push myself than fudge around and have to stay late or work harder to make up for the distractions. I find this job to be different and more intense than any other I've ever done. Don't get me wrong - I love what I do, but I sometimes daydream about that patch of moss on the other side of the fence.

I'm going to the coast this weekend and hope to get some beautiful shots to share. I plan to make a concerted effort at creative photographic evidence for all to enjoy.

One other item from the edge - Read Your Mail ! Not one but TWO pieces of mail attempted to pull the wool over my eyes yesterday. In desperate times come desperate measures, so just read your mail. Not email, snail mail. It's evil - keep it in line.